I’m not a typical blogger. I’ve found many blogs that I like to check into every now and again, but I’m not a writer. I like to ramble and don’t want to have to edit my stream of thoughts.
But I’ve found myself feeling so completely alone after my last miscarriage, miscarriage #6. The one that happened after a dozen ultrasounds assured me that my baby was healthy, growing on track, perfect. There are groups on Facebook that talk about recurrent miscarriage and groups on BabyCenter to talk about losses in the 2nd/3rd trimester, and then there’s supposed to be my friends in real life. Oh and my husband (who truly is a wonderful man, btw). And yet it still feels like there’s no one there. No one who understands, no one who wants to understand. Hell, if it wasn’t my life that I was dealing with, *I* wouldn’t want to understand. I don’t want to be around myself so why should I expect that anyone else wants to be around me?
So I’m putting it out here. Maybe someday I can look back and see how far I’ve come. Maybe I’ll read my ramblings and make sense of it all.